Note: This letter is a real letter filled with emotion and facts about this mother's experience. This is a true, first person piece and we chose to not edit wording that some may find offensive. As birth workers we hold space for anyone to share their feelings from happiness to anger and everything in between. We understand that not all care providers in Delaware are in the group this letter speaks of but to honor this mother's difficulty we are printing the letter in its entirety.
Dear Delaware Midwives and OBs (at least the ones I've seen),
As a mother of 4 and a doula, as well as someone pursuing midwifery, I want to thank you. The absolutely horrible, non-evidenced based care I've received this pregnancy has made it clear to me that I need to be the change I want to see. I'm unsure if the complete lack of evidence based care is due to the doctors backing you, being stuck in old ways, or simply because I'm a fairly young minority, but it has to stop. Before you get your panties all in a knot, I'm not saying that it's deliberate but it is apparent and disturbing. You should be advocating for your patients, not using generalizations and scare tactics to get women to comply with the outdated, and downright invasive interventions put forth.
There is no need for routine cervical checks from 36 weeks on. There is absolutely no reason a VBAC mama needs to deliver on YOUR fucked up timeline of 39-40 weeks or else a repeat c-section is scheduled. There is no reason that accurate alternatives to the Glucose Tolerance Test (GTT) aren't readily available, such as the jellybean test or simply testing blood sugar 4x/day for a week. I for one won't stand for it. I will fight and advocate for myself, and I will educate you while I'm at it. I want to ensure that ignorance cannot be your scapegoat. I'm not saying that all midwives and OBs in this state are bad, but in this case the bad apples most certainly ruin the bunch.
In all my pregnancies, I have never had to fight so hard to have my rights acknowledged and respected. In experiencing this, it is reminding me how far maternal care in this country still needs to come. So I will advocate for myself. I will educate those unaware. I will ensure that the women coming to you for care, whether for their 1st child or 15th, are aware of their rights and are knowledgeable on how to advocate for them. I will make the knowledge needed for the most common interventions readily available so that even if you fail to provide full informed consent, they are still informed.
I will be the change I want to see.
Sincerely,
The 3rd time VBAC mom you didn't believe in
As a mother of 4 and a doula, as well as someone pursuing midwifery, I want to thank you. The absolutely horrible, non-evidenced based care I've received this pregnancy has made it clear to me that I need to be the change I want to see. I'm unsure if the complete lack of evidence based care is due to the doctors backing you, being stuck in old ways, or simply because I'm a fairly young minority, but it has to stop. Before you get your panties all in a knot, I'm not saying that it's deliberate but it is apparent and disturbing. You should be advocating for your patients, not using generalizations and scare tactics to get women to comply with the outdated, and downright invasive interventions put forth.
There is no need for routine cervical checks from 36 weeks on. There is absolutely no reason a VBAC mama needs to deliver on YOUR fucked up timeline of 39-40 weeks or else a repeat c-section is scheduled. There is no reason that accurate alternatives to the Glucose Tolerance Test (GTT) aren't readily available, such as the jellybean test or simply testing blood sugar 4x/day for a week. I for one won't stand for it. I will fight and advocate for myself, and I will educate you while I'm at it. I want to ensure that ignorance cannot be your scapegoat. I'm not saying that all midwives and OBs in this state are bad, but in this case the bad apples most certainly ruin the bunch.
In all my pregnancies, I have never had to fight so hard to have my rights acknowledged and respected. In experiencing this, it is reminding me how far maternal care in this country still needs to come. So I will advocate for myself. I will educate those unaware. I will ensure that the women coming to you for care, whether for their 1st child or 15th, are aware of their rights and are knowledgeable on how to advocate for them. I will make the knowledge needed for the most common interventions readily available so that even if you fail to provide full informed consent, they are still informed.
I will be the change I want to see.
Sincerely,
The 3rd time VBAC mom you didn't believe in
 | Jen SilveraJen is a dedicated birth worker and mother of (now) 5. She has had every birth experience imaginable and is a wealth of knowledge from all her education and experiences. Jen is also and LPN and has midwifery in her future. You can read more about Jen here. |
